Had my first appointment today with my counselor to try and get this (whatever this is) dealt with.
My life lesson learned today – Even when you push uncomfortable things to the side to focus on “more important” things.. those hurts and thoughts from events don’t go away no matter how long you ignore them, or how long you choose to focus elsewhere. They remain unprocessed and undealt with until you actively do something with them. At some point there will be a tipping point, where it catches up to you because you’ve used up all the space you can stuff things. You may feel like you’ve escaped, because time and/or distance has passed.. but you won’t have… not until you breakdown and do the work of processing those emotions.
It’s Interesting. Never thought of myself as “textbook” but apparently.. in some regards I am.. but on the bright side.. my struggles are apparently within reason and totally sane.