Here and now..

I believe it to be quite a common mistake, for us  as humans to allow our minds  to live and focus in on  time frames that do not offer us much benefit.

Often we  allow ourselves to linger far to often among the unchanging shadows of our pasts,  or put too much trust into the promise of  our future, as if it were a guarantee.  There are no guarantees.. Anxiety and frustration, stress and worry invade our present time,  and it hardly ever is because of what is happening to you right this second is it? Be honest, generally most of our stress is generated from past regrets, and future possible worries.

How many times do we rush through our day, because of our need to get onto the next thing? The next meeting, the next hour, the next appointment..

How often do we give our loved ones half-hearted quick hugs because we really don’t have the time to be stationary? How often do we walk out in the sun, and truly enjoy the feeling of it on our skin, or the simple joy that can be found all around us… right this second.. right now..

The happenings of now are seemingly unimportant. We pretty often inadvertently allow ourselves to  “live” in an autopilot mode, because we are focusing our attention elsewhere.  I think this is a total disservice.  By doing this, not only do  we rob ourselves of a whole other level of appreciation of life, an enjoyment of the small things that make our experiences so much richer, but we also put ourselves in the position to make sloppy decisions.   It is extremely unhealthy in that, if you think about it… all the choices you ever make, are made at a certain “present” point in time.  If we are not truly present in mind, or even if we only allow ourselves to be half present, than how can we ever hope to live our life to its potential? Making a non-decision, can be as disabling as making a wrong decision. If we don’t strive to focus on here and now, than what kind of choices are we making? How are we putting forth our best effort?

Think of your life right this second..  Take some time to live in your right now, for that is truly where all of our opportunity lies. Its  not in the winds of the past nor the guess of the future, but in your actions and reactions that are happening right this second.

Oddities..

The MS has been relatively calm lately although there have been a few new odd symptoms.  As much as they advise MS sufferers to avoid warm baths, in the past couple weeks it has occasionally been the only way to get my left leg to be the least bit warm.  It gets so completely cold!  So weird!

Middleground… where is it?

How I yearn for Middleground!

I sometimes dream of a place  that only exists in fantasy, kinda like Never Never Land, only with far less fairies and glorified misbehaving children.

Middleground would be a beautifully peaceful place of  open minds and actual intelligent discussions.  People would work together with enthusiasm to promote a healthier way of life. The inhabitants would be good stewards of the earth, and their actions would not at all be tied into monetary, political, or individual gain. A place where people felt safe to have actual conversations where they used actual facts, and were open minded to the fact that often there may be more than one “right” way to accomplish a goal. People would not be “demonized” just for having a different take or view.

Nice dream I know, but wouldn’t it be nice?

What induced this daydream you may ask? Mostly it is out of a lot of recent head shaking.. Not physical head shaking mind you, its nothing that can be pinned to the MS or any other unknown issue I may have.  Its spurred out of wondering sometimes what people are thinking.

I’ve come to the conclusion that common sense just doesn’t grow on trees, and contrary to popular belief, it doesn’t appear to be as  ‘common’ as its name implies.. in fact, I think it should be relabeled to be called “Rare Sense”

Lately I’ve just really noticed an impatience in myself with people. Its a flaw I will work on resolving in myself because maybe I’m just having a “blue” time and its not as bad as I think.  I’m open to the possibility…

Sometimes I just get emotionally tired. I feel like I live in a constant state of “weighing in” how much I let myself trust any information anyone gives me about almost anything. Paranoia or self preservation? I don’t rightly know at this point.. maybe its just discouragement. I’m kind of sad about the way the world is going.

With each point someone tells me, lately my mind seems to pour over not only what the person is saying, but also things like – taking considerations as to why someone may believe something to be true, what they are hoping to accomplish by repeating it, what their motives are, and the degree in which I can trust what they say.

I just kind kind of feels like our society’s priorities have shifted into an extremely material mode. Selfishness run-a-muck, and money being the priority in most everything. Its an overwhelming “all about me” attitude.

Many just don’t seem to think twice about saying negative things about others or to others. There is little thought given to the damage even simple words can do.  It doesn’t seem to even matter if something is true or not, because once the implication is out there, its hard to combat. People seem  content to  blindly follow the herd.  Information manipulation is common place and it’s just accepted, and sometimes even praised.. its sickening.

I can hardly stand to listen or read even the news anymore. It seems to all be so theatrical, and even the regular news shows just seem so much more like tabloids than anything else. Catty responses and insincerity, especially from tv reporters who seem so incredibly fake and fickle . Most have no problem reporting on things they know nothing about, and the bigger and more scandalous they can make things sound the better. Even the most serious of events are twisted and stretched to get the networks more “bang for their buck” I suppose.

I don’t know if it has always been this way, or if I’m just slow and just now noticing. It just seems that everywhere I look, that people are so disrespectful with their words and actions. Its not just kids, its adults a whole lot. I don’t think adults have much right to complain about kids when as adults we don’t insist on a certain level of respect to be maintained, not only in how we interact with people ourselves,  but also in those we even inadvertently “support” by continuing to buy in to their antics.  People make lots of money off of us. These celebrities, big and small are recognized and at times praised  for having bad priorities and being selfish and spiteful towards others, and they continue to be successful. Its no wonder kids are so confused!  We really need to spend more time explaining this crazy world, either that, or fixing attitudes..

I don’t understand.  have we gotten to the point where the whole world has excessive  ADD, and has to constantly be entertained?  Must everything be such a menageries?  Its no wonder we are in the predicament we are in.. so many just don’t seem to care, and even worse, don’t seem to even detect a problem.

So much is concentrated on how much money we can make, our physical appearance, keeping up with or being better than “whoever”.  Little to no value is placed on character or integrity, its all about the money it seems.  Its extremely depressing, even for an optimist. So many real issues go unresolved, actual problems are barely addressed and at times ignored.

Maybe I’m just a grump today.. if so.. sorry to those who endured.. course I guess you could have stopped reading at any point.. hehe…

in any case, my blog is a cheap form of therapy…

whew…

What is hope?

What is hope? Why is it important?

Hope has many definitions, but the one that I found that  I think is the most complete states; “to look forward to with desire and reasonable confidence.”

I think that it is imperative for our human spirit to have goals.  It is what keep us going, what keeps us moving forward, and without goals we will wither away. In order for us to accomplish our goals, we need to have the desire to put forth the effort, and what inspires us to invest this effort? Hope of course! A hopeful attitude is near required to reach any of our goals and dreams for our life.  Hope is what gives us the strength to get through some of the tougher instances in our lives.

I maintain the speculation that choosing to live a life full of hope and coming upon the end and finding you were wrong,  is still far less of a tragedy then living a life with no hope, and finding yourself right.

This is my stand on my MS. I may be wrong in the end, but I choose not to just let it take me down, not spiritually anyway.  I can see the differences when I allow things to get to me and start worrying.  In the end, I suppose it will do what it will do, but in the mean time I am hopeful that I can do what I can, that I can listen to my body and fight it as much as I can, and that overall, it will be me that prevails in living my life.. not the MS.

Celebrating a life…

I would be pretty amazed at this point if anyone could honestly say that they hadn’t heard that the “King of Pop” Michael Jackson passed away this past Thursday. Even before Television could  report it,  news spread amazingly fast over the internet.

As huge of a sensation as he was, he was not above problems. Pain medicine dependence, and scandals plagued the last years of his life. While he was acquitted and found not guilty, its one of those instances where suspicion can never be erased.   I contend that sticks and stones may break your bones, but words CAN actually ruin you. This is something that I periodically try to stress to my kids. Trust is lost incredibly easily, and in many cases it doesn’t have to even be proved that you have done anything wrong, its the insinuation that you may have that does the most damage. Part of protecting yourself is not getting yourself in to situations where things can be questioned.

Regardless of whatever the truth actually is, there are many that are still pretty adamant as to what they “believe”. Many are not the least bit consciousness of simple truth that they will never actually know for certain. Possibly saddest of all is that there are even those that don’t even really even have an opinion, they just repeat things to get laughs.   I’m of the opinion that I’ll never know.  Not only that, but its not my place to know, or judge what can’t be proved without a reasonable doubt. So on that unfortunate subject, I say that only God knows, and since an audience with God was Jackson’s next appointment, it should be left at that.

Michael Jackson has been been a globally recognized brand for the past 4 decades.  Whether or not you loved or hated him, the fact cannot be argued that the man had a tremendous impact on the music industry. He was a very talented entertainer, he was amazingly good at the things he was good at. Singing and Dancing were definitely his god given talents.  He was a huge part of music as I knew it growing up. The music was fun and made me smile, if not dance. It is a little amazing to me that I didn’t even really realize how much of his music I really liked growing up.  I was one of those that loved music, but never really kept up with who was singing the songs.

Saturday our family watched  a few tributes on Youtube.com and else where. We played some of his music, and through it was transported back to distinct periods of time in our own lives. Memories that hadn’t been thought of in quite awhile, in many regards, through listening to the tributes that were initiated to celebrate his life, it actually ended up inspiring us to celebrate our own!

So with that, I leave you a couple of my favorites…

Thoughts of an Optimist…

What good does it do anyone to cry that their glass is half empty?   In my opinion a half empty glass is an obvious display that you’ve already had more good than bad..

#1 You have a glass don’t you? stop complaining, some people don’t

#2 Someone at some point thought enough of you to offer you a glass in the first place, or you had enough wealth to buy a glass, or enough knowledge to make one.. You were blessed..

#3 If its “your” glass, then that means you’ve probably been drinking off of it all night right?

#4 You still have the whole other half available to you don’t you? Plus sometimes, its the last of the drink that tastes the best.

#5 Chances are that when you finish the other half, that your thirst will have been satisfied.

#6 Even if your thirst isn’t totally satisfied, or you are whining because someone only poured you half a glass to begin with,  its still fact that you now have an empty glass that you can fill with whatever you wish. An opportunity to try something else if you want..

Want me to go on? hehe.. I can go on for quite awhile, I can be quite annoying with it when I choose.. ^^

It does us no good to dwell on the negatives.  It is wasted energy that gets us no where near our goals.  There are some thrive on the attention, but in the end all they will have is a few words of pity and sympathy, and they will still be in the same situation because they focused on the injustice instead of finding a way out of the hole. While others may try, you are the only one who can control your attitude, so use it as a tool instead of a dead weight.

Struggles and problems aren’t really the enemy, many provide the opportunity to learn important things we not yet know. No – the real enemy can quietly lie undetected in how we choose to react to our problems, and that is what causes us the most pain.

Live, Learn, Laugh, and most of all Love!

~ Serina

Happy Father’s Day!!

Happy Father’s Day Everyone!  I saw this little video this morning, and thought I’d share.

Fatherhood is something to be celebrated. I wish everyone looked at it the way that this Chief Petty Officer John Lehnen does!  No matter what you do in your life, If you are a parent, then being a parent is actually the most critical. You are bringing up the next generation and shaping the future..  I wish it was a relationship that was taken more seriously. Any man can father a child, but it takes a real man to be a Father!

The number 31

The number 31 describes:

• days in 8 of the 12 months during any given year
• a prime number
• advertised flavors at Baskin-Robbins..
• the name of a townhouse hotel in Dublin Ireland
• candles on my imaginary birthday cake today..

What do you believe?

I find it interesting how, being the very unique individuals we are, we still seem to have this incessant need to define and categorize ourselves. We do this not only with our religions, our politics,  and many other public and private preferences. As much as we fight to not be stereotypical, we still tend to put ourselves in these neat little boxes.

Why do we do this? We do it because humans are social beings… even the so called anti-social ones.  I say “so called” because no matter how much a person claims to not care, or not want to be around others, the fact is we all have our own ideal of how we want to be seen by ourselves and others, an internally and sometimes hidden desire of how we want to be classified.

So in considering these classifications, it makes me wonder.  In the classifications that we choose for ourselves, How many things do we really believe in because we actually believe in them? How many things have we actually put thought into, and actually believe because where our heart or head leads us when the subject comes up?

How many “beliefs” are purely based on others? Based off opinions from parents, friends, church members, coworkers, etc..? How many things to we “believe in” just because we are expected to… by whatever category we’ve put ourselves in? In truth, how many times to we just accept a full viewpoint as being our own, even if we haven’t personally put any thought, or investigated it for ourselves?

Just curious…

Here is an example of what I mean, How often do people vote for someone purely on what political party they affiliate themselves with? Maybe I am under informed, but is there a book out there somewhere that bullet points out what you believe if you are considered a part of a political party? A Republican or Democrat? a Liberal?

I get that a religious affiliation’s bible is their book that serves this purpose, but then there are so many offshoots because of differential (sometimes oppositional even) perceptions of the same exact words.

It seems a bit overwhelming when you think of it. Who is on “right” side? Aside from personal preference sometimes researched, and many times not… how do you know where you stand?

I don’t think its healthy to just accept, or expect that just because someone affiliates themselves with the same group you do, that they will have the same motivations and agree with you.  Nor is it intelligent to think that just because someone is “in” what is viewed as an “opposing” group as you, that they will automatically have different personal motivations, or that everything they stand for is wrong.

I think its intellectually irresponsible to harbor a closed mind. We are too unique as individuals for a world of millions to be that cut and dry, that black and white. I think the world is largely comprised of varying shades of grey.  You can find bits of  truth in everything, even when its an idea you don’t particularly buy into completely. Everyone has different experiences and have uncovered very separate and different bits of truth…

Why close your mind and cut yourself off from whatever possible bits of truth you can find?  Life is a scavenger hunt..

Way to go Shelsea!

My daughter came home from school yesterday pretty ecstatic. She received an “Outstanding Academic Achievement” award that was signed by President Obama. It also came with a signed letter, and a lapel pin with the presidential seal on it. Way to go Shels!!